Emily Giffin's "Love the One You're With"; Breakup Phrases

Think of that ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend of yours. You know, HIM. Or HER. The one whose very name you still makes you weak in the knees. The one you feel badly about dumping, or who you still secretly wish hadn’t dumped you. Then imagine running into him or her again, completely by chance, three months after you’ve married someone else – and this ex seems to want you back. What would you do?

That’s the premise of the wholly satisfying novel I finished reading yesterday: “Love the One You’re With” by Emily Giffin. It was overly sentimental at times, but talk about a page-turner -- I had every intention of going to the gym last night but couldn’t put the book down long enough to walk there! I won’t reveal too much, in case you want to read it. But Giffin was pretty skillful in showing the seemingly perfect husband and the ostensibly jerky ex, then slowly revealing more about each character until you realize the situation isn’t that clear-cut. It also got me wondering about how much of relationships is luck, how much is choice, and how much is fate. Quite a read.

Then I was perusing the eHarmony web site, and an article caught my eye called “5 Breakup Phrases: Words that Signal the End” (http://advice.eharmony.com/?page=articles/view&AID=2021&cid=2091&aid=71605). I was hoping it would give me ideas for how to phrase my e-mail to Drummer Boy (no, I still haven’t written him back; yes, I’m terrible). Apparently if you hear any of the following from your significant other, they could be halfway out the door: 1) “I need space.” 2) “I’ll call you later” (accompanied by an exasperated sigh) 3) “So-and-So doesn’t do that!” (comparing you to somebody else) 4) Profane insults and name-calling. 5) Nothing – you’ve entirely stopped communicating. In “Love the One You’re With,” some of those warning signs had led the protagonist and her long-lost ex to break up in the first place.