Cheating

Here’s the latest on Mr. No Touchy-Feely: he e-mailed me last Wednesday and left me a voicemail on Thursday. I sent him an e-mail on Friday morning. Didn’t hear from him again until Tuesday evening, when he left me a voicemail after getting home from work and before going back out to another activity. I e-mailed him on Wednesday. He e-mailed me yesterday (Thursday) saying he could call me that night. I e-mailed that a friend and I would be having dinner and watching the “Office” season finale together, but I could call him Friday night if he’d be around. He e-mailed me back that he would be around, and that we could exchange our reviews of “The Office” when we talk. So, I’ll give him a call tonight. I do think he’s shy, at least in some ways (well, obviously!). But I like him enough to want to give him more of a chance. We’ll see.

Meanwhile, one of my friends (thanks, Gwen!) sent me a link to this article on “how to cheat-proof your marriage” (http://www.20daypersuasion.com/cheatproof-marriage-sample.htm). Do you agree with this paragraph?

“Men enter into a relationship or marriage expecting a woman to stay as beautiful and easy to handle. Women enter into a relationship or marriage expecting a man to change for the better. These differences are often what lead to breakups, separations, or divorces. These differences, along with the fact that men constantly want excitement, and women need affirmation and praise, all lead to infidelity.”

What do you think? Seems a bit stereotypical to me – “easy to handle,” that’s a more appropriate description for a horse than a person! Don’t most people of either gender want excitement AND affirmation AND praise? (I know I do! :) However, I did identify with the part about expecting/hoping a man will change for the better. Part of me seems to be attracted to guys who need mothering, guys with a lot of potential who haven’t quite gotten their act together in some way. It’s something I have to fight against. After all, it’s a lose-lose situation to get involved with and try to “improve” someone who isn’t willing to improve themselves. Much better to be with someone I like so much, I don’t feel they need any improvement. :)

The article also claims that cheating is the most common reason for divorce. But isn’t cheating due to some earlier problem in the marriage that went unaddressed? I would think that cheating would be a symptom of relationship trouble, not a cause.